Be Kind

This is may come off as a little harsh but there is a rule that I have developed since coming to university that I very firmly believe and wish to share.

Going through a rough time is NOT an excuse for treating others badly.

Everyone has a story, most of us have seen out fair share of hardship and you cannot possibly judge what someone else's may be. I am 100% guilty of this. I've been under the impression that because I've had a fair bit of personal and academic experience with mental illness and alike, I can judge other people's stories just by looking at them and then treat them accordingly. The thing is, even if I'm somewhat correct, there's always details that I miss by assuming.

So, you're having a rough time and rip into someone nearby because (whether you realize it or not) it feels like the world is being cruel to you and that nobody can possibly understand how hard your life is. I completely understand that when you're right in the middle of something rough, it's hard to be pleasant all the time- especially if you're at university or something and having to be in constant interactions with your roommate, hall-mates, whatever- but for all you may know, that person is really struggling too and also can't handle one more thing.

When I was right in the middle of adjusting to depression and coming to terms with it, I was no great treat to have around...just ask my family...and a huge reason for that was that I truly believed that nobody else's life was as unfair as mine. Would I have ever phrased it like that? Of course not. I'm not stupid, I know there's always someone less fortunate...but I couldn't see how anyone in my life could possibly have anything as hard as I did.

I walked around my school pissed at everyone; I was sassy and rude to anyone who looked at me sideways. If I'm being totally honest, I imposed upon them the same thing that many assumed about me, "your life is perfect, how could you possibly understand depression?" Then I got a bit of a reality check and had to come to the realization that a good number of those girls did not deserve that judgement or the way I was treating them.

The truth of the matter is that you can't understand others' stories, you just can't. You will not be able to step into their shoes; you'll never even be able to listen if you don't step back from your life and realize that other people have a story to share. Chances are that if you stop running your mouth off long enough to see what they're going through...you'll end up like me...feeling a touch embarrassed for classifying them incorrectly. 

Having issues or baggage is not an excuse to be rude or mean to others. Nor is it an excuse to assume anything about them.